Another Interstate 5 Trade

May 13, 2011: SEATTLE

Earlier this morning, Seattle sent Kevin Stephens and minor leaguer Justin "Hanky" Pankey to Los Angeles in exchange for relief prospect Sidney Martone and a fifth round pick in next year's draft. Hopefully the players involved in today's deal will be able to make it to their new homes, despite the flooding in Southwest Washington that has closed Interstate 5.

"Kevin's been a part of our team that has taken the last two Cecil Cups," said Owner/GM Mack Shultz. "He's never really gotten the chance to start for us on a regular basis though and we know that's frustrated him. Michael [Weintraub, the LA Scorpion's Owner/GM] told me that he expects to get Stephens in the rotation soon. That was good enough for me to agree to send Kevin over. He deserves this shot."

"I'm thrilled," said Stephens as he cleaned out his locker room on the off day. "I've watched people come up from the minors and take spots that I thought I'd get, and that bugged me. Nothing against Izzie [Frau] or Isaac [Diehl], but I thought I deserved those chances. But then, when they signed Albert Garcia this offseason, that was the last straw for me. Albert's a great guy and all, but he's like 700 years old. Just give me a chance. That's all I'm saying."

Pankey was a second round pick by the Monarchs in 2005, but hasn't yet lived up to his initial promise. He had posted a 2.45 ERA this year though out of the Kent Kings' bullpen.

Martone was released by Covington earlier this season during the brief reign of HAL 9000 as GM, an experiment in artificial intelligence that the league mercifully ended when wheeler-dealer Jeremy Goldman took control.

"We offered a contract to Martone when he was a free agent, but he took Michael's offer," explained Shultz. "He claimed it rained too much here. Well, he's in our system now, so he'd better just buy a damn umbrella and shut up."